Knowing When to Let Go

 Sometimes God places people or obstacles in our life’s to stretch our comfort zones. Other times I can’t help but wonder if he’s testing us to see if we will pass or fail the same test that he has presented to us time and time again. Then there are the times when we allow for people/obstacles to remain in our lives unnecessarily causing ourselves to deal with avoidable issues. (Something like the definition of insanity …. You know doing the same thing over and over again …. expecting different results!)
This can apply to various areas in our lives like our attitudes, situations at work, our relationships including friendships and heck sometimes even our family members.
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It poses the question, when should you decide to completely block out/alter someones placement in your life or release yourself from a situation?

You may be in a situation where you are personally involved with someone who CLEARLY does not contribute to the relationship on the same level that you do. Or maybe you have a friendship with someone and over the duration of your friendship you discover that things have changed and you all do not connect the same way as you once did.

At what point are we setting ourselves up for failure by holding on to this relationship and in essence allowing {insert here –> ourselves/emotions/self esteem/well being} to be ran over by a tractor trailer?

We have to have the ability to see the situation for what it truly is, take off the emotional specs and put on the logical/analytical specs. We have to look at the correlation between us and the situation. We should ask ourselves what was the relationship founded on? Look for the commonalities and the support. Is it applied by both people? Now dig a little deeper, most people behave a certain way because of life experiences and normally they have always been the person that they are before we encountered them but we may just now be recognizing it. We need to be able to recognize these things and not take their actions towards us personally. We must also have the ability to take a look at ourselves and see how we are contributing to the situation. Are we doing something wrong or could our actions somehow be taken offensively?

Being able to objectively assess the situation or the individual for what it is can assist in our decision making process. Objectivity allows us to, lets be frank, not be as salty about it.

After all, everyone will not be able to return what we may be able to give so easily. Maybe  you are supposed to serve as their example that they have the ability to do more.

This post is not some philosophical stint, I do not have all the answers and will never pretend to, I guess the answer varies with each person.

My criteria is going to be:

1) Is the situation or person CONSTANTLY draining my spirit?

2) Is the situation or person adding more negative than positive value to my life?

3) Is our relationship reciprocated? (Meaning are they there for me when needed like I’m there for them.)

I don’t have it all figured out and according to my great aunt who’s 83, we will NEVER have it all figured out while on God’s green earth lol but hopefully we’re all growing and learning while we’re here. I’m finding that the older I get, the more I value my time. Time is the most valuable asset to us humans, simply because we can not recreate/replicate it. No matter how much money you have you can not add one minute to your life when it’s your time to go, it’s your time to go. Therefore, I’m going to try my hardest not to waste my time, and if the answer to the majority of the above questions is ‘YES’ ….. it  may be time for me to let go!

What about you? How do you decide when it’s time to let go of a person or situation?

~XOXO~

VeCoya

The Greene Sisters! We share the same values but different viewpoints. We talk about healthy relationships, fab hair & our own unique experiences.

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